Week 2

Lately I've had several conversations with Sifu Hayes about how our thought patterns change as you age. Some pretty cool stuff, he's an intelligent guy. One such topic regarded how your brain changes how it processes information around every 10 years or so. Thinking back on the time, I have to admit I do see some fundamental perception shifts every decade or so. I remember looking back at 30 something and thinking "was I ever that young" while listening to the 20 somethings around me. At Christmas my sister and I were in the kitchen listening to our teenage nephews challenge each other about having life figured out and all we could do was chuckle together and enjoy how the kids were in a rush to sound grown up. Silly kids. The thing is I didn't expect this "aging brain" to affect how I learn. I've always been a huge advocate of continueing learning, asking the questions, and working to find ways to make the knowledge stick. I've never had a problem learning new things and my learning curve has always been super fast. So maybe that is why I feel taken aback that I'm no longer able to keep up to my old self. Something about old dogs if I remember correctly. Maybe I have gotten so entrenched in my comfort zone that I didn't realize I wasn't challenging myself hard enough. I think back to "but I learned to do this and it wasn't an issue" only to remember that was how many years ago? Surfing 2000, Skydiving 2006, Scuba diving 2010. But it seams like yesterday. Don't get me wrong, I haven't been stagnating. I've just started thinking about why I am feeling like I'm struggling with my lofty new goals. Why I feel like I'm not progressing with my forms, weapon and guitar as quickly as I would have "once upon a time". Thing is I'm getting positive feedback, and I believe and value that feedback. I just seem to remember learning was so much easier in the past. Granted we're all our own worst critic, and I've always had a harder line with myself than is probably healthy. I guess this situation took me by surprise. I've always practiced new things, I've just never worried about being able to retain them before. Sounds arrogant. Really arrogant. But that's not my intention. This isn't a cry for help, nor is it intended to lament the passage of time. I just find it curious that I am perceiving such a dramatic change in my definition of normal progression. I feel a bit like I'm in uncharted waters. Which doesn't bother me per say, it's just different. When I travel, I rarely know where I am going. I get in my vehicle, point it a random direction and watch for shiny things along the way. Its more irritating than worrisome. The bottom line is this team, this journey we are taking in the Year of the Dog, comes down to recognizing where we are, being honest and not sugar coating the truth. I find myself thinking about why the body and mind work the way they do and not just taking for granted that they do. Something to mull over perhaps. Not to worry though. My mid life crisis was last year, and I have the motorcycle to prove it.