I taught my dad how to drive the quad this weekend. We went around in 1st gear with a top speed of 8. I told him how to shift up and was informed that he was quite happy where he was. At least he tried something new, and had fun with it. Baby steps. Next weekend, reverse maybe?

Nothing Changes

I'm sitting here with my dog. Sometimes I envy her. She's got it pretty good. Comfortable place to sleep, plenty of food and people that love her, and a job (chasing cows) that she lives for. She is very content, yet she has that uncanny compassion that animals are famous for. She knows when you are hurting, and despite of how good she may have it, she genuinely hurts with you. You can't get a better friend than that. No judgement, no dishonesty, no blame, just a desire to share your journey.

I spent the week handing out resumes. The last person I worked for, well, it didn't go as expected or hoped. The logical side tries to convince me that there was no malice intent. The experience side reaffirms that you can only rely on yourself. Sadly, the experience side tends to win these internal conflicts when it comes to judging human nature.

I made a choice regarding my career future when I got back. The factors involved placed the choice I made at the top. It seemed the best option I had at the time. I made a decision based on the information I was given, and with faith that the promises made would be fulfilled. Didn't work out despite my best efforts. Sometimes things fail, that's alright. Sometimes people fail, that's forgivable. Sometimes people don't seem to care and put you in a position causes you in long term harm, regardless of their intentions. Call me rigid, unforgiving, cold, what ever, but I have a hard time accepting that one. As they say "The road to Hell is paved with good intentions".

I've been having some conflicts with a friend lately. As with all things, it takes two to have a conflict. I believe I take responsibility for my actions, I do my best to anyway. I trust this person not to have malice intent, but it still hurts to be in the situation. It can feel like it's one sided, like the other person isn't willing to see your perspective. I have no doubt that they feel the same way toward me. Hopefully coolers heads will prevail, and the situation can get sorted. The alternative keeps me awake at night.

A friend of mine was killed in the war 3 years and 3 months ago. His birthday is on Monday, he would have been 35 this year. I miss him.

So many more have lost their lives in the past 3 years. I've watch so many friends leave. I wait for so many more to deploy. I pray they come back to those they love, not back to their graves. There is nothing I can do for them, I feel completely helpless. Our government wants to extend the occupation of the Middle East. They don't listen to the people they are supposed to represent when we call out for them to bring back our troops safely. I would like them to look me in the eye and tell me why. What is more death going to get us? Is it really in our nature to destroy ourselves? Sure seems that way.

Play the cards you're dealt, guess that's all any of us can do.

Embrace the Fear

"Embrace the Fear

I must not fear, fear is the mind killer
Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration
I will face my fear
I will permit it to pass over and through me
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing
Only I will remain"

Frank Herbert

Sometimes I think I'm not dying fast enough

I have a nasty flue and a migraine.... Coughing makes my head want to explode, and I wouldn't mind the dizziness if only I could regulate my body temp... ice cold one second, sweating bullets the next. If I were a horse someone would have the good sense to put me down. I hate being sick. Can't last forever though... right?

Moa

The Moa bird was one of the last giant birds. It was a native of New Zealand and consisted of 11 sub species. They were the only species of birds that were truly wingless... lacking even vestigial wings that other large land birds have (ostrich, emu, cassowary, etc). They were a "running" bird, but they were very unique from their distant cousins.

For starters, New Zealand completely lacked mammals (with the exception of bats) until it was colonized by the Maori people. It also lacked reptiles with the exception of the skink and the gecko. This translated to having no land based natural predators. New Zealand (a very young land mass, as they go) was pretty much populated by birds only and was one massive rain forest. Now, thanks to human influence, it has more sheep than people. Seriously, it has around 13 times more sheep than people, and the forests have been clearcut to a large degree to make way for agricultural interests.

But I digress. The Moa birds were a giant flightless bird. They were unique in that their growth rate took several years to mature, and this was evident in rings in their bones, much the same as rings of trees. All other birds mature with in a year, as rapid maturity helped protect them from enemies and gave them an advantage for quicker procreation and therefore survival. Having no natural land predators gave Moa's the freedom to grow slower and to much larger size than all other birds (with the exception of the elephant bird of Madagascar, also extinct due to human over hunting). The elephant bird was of similar height, but much heavier.

The Moa's were the dominant herbivores and ruled both the north and south islands for hundreds of thousands of years. They reached sizes up to 13' tall and weighed up to 606.5 lb. The females were up to 1.5 times the size of males, and could get up to 3 times the weight of males. The eggs were 10" by 7". Very impressive.

The Moa's extinction is a direct result to the colonization of New Zealand. Having no natural land predators, and being quite large, they had no fear of humans. The Maori literally just walked up to them and killed them. Being an easy and strong food source had the Maori hunting the Moa extensively, and their slow maturity made their numbers drop exceedingly fast. They were completely wiped out in a matter of years.

There are still Moa sightings, but again most of that is just wishful thinking.

Thylacine AKA Tasmanian Tiger

My love affair with Australia started as a small child. Any time we were given a research assignment throughout school I would report on Australia. Ayres Rock, Olgas, Aboriginals, Wild life... you name it, I was fascinated with it.

Especially wild life. I have always had a special connection with animals. People through out my life have been very cruel. To this day, I have little or no trust for my fellow homosapiens. But animals were another story. Animals are instinctual. If they did things we humans found cruel, it was because that is the way they are made, not the way they chose to be.

Australia has by far the most unique animals, be them reptilian, mammalian, or avery. Marsupials exist no where else on the planet with the sole exception of the Water Opossum (strangely found in Mexico, Central and South America, and Argentina).

Australia also has the worst track record in history of any other country on the planet when it comes to the extinction of it's native animals due to European colonization. A staggering 50% of all the native animals have become extinct in only 200 years. Hunting, introduction of K9's and felines, deforestation and encroachment into habitat have destroyed some of the most unique and oldest wilderness. A tragedy that cannot be reversed, regardless of desire and intent.

The Thylacine, or Tasmanian Tiger is one of the most recent victims. A very shy and misunderstood creature that was hunted to extinction due to ignorance and intolerance. The last known Tassie Tiger died at the Hobart Zoo in Tasmania on September 7, 1936. His name was Benjamin, and he was thought to have died from neglect. He was locked out of his shelter exposing him to the extreme Tasmanian weather - blistering heat in the day, freezing temperatures at night.

Benjamin and his kind were of the only two known kinds of marsupials that had a pouch in both sexes. Once again the other being the Water Opossum. They (Tasmanian Tigers) were the largest living meat eating marsupials. Very few marsupials are carnivores, making the Tigers even more rare.

Thylacines first appeared on the planet 4 million years ago. 4 million years of survival, only to be wiped out by humans 74 years ago. Says a lot doesn't it?

They populated Australia and New Guinea, but closer to modern times their last refuge was Tasmania. They had similar body type to canines; sharp teeth, powerful jaws, raised heels, and similar body form. They were sandy to red in colour and had 13 to 21 bold black stripes down their backs and into their tails. They were short haired with a stiff tail which extended from the body in a similar way to that of a kangaroo. Unlike other marsupials it's pouch opened to the rear of it's body.

The Tassie Tigers could open their jaws up to 120 degrees. Longer snout with muscular and powerful jaws, housing 46 teeth. They had one of the strongest bites for any mammal. Despite it's many combative attributes, it was an extremely shy animal that would go out of it's way to avoid conflict with other animals and humans. (completely unlike it's cousin the Devil).

They had a stiff gate and would often stand upright on it's hind legs for brief periods of time, much like the kangaroo. It would growl and hiss when angry, and show it's threatening "yawn". It did not bark as K9's do, but would give a series of rapid guttural cough-like yaps. It also had a long whining cry, and a low snuffling noise used for communicating with pack members.

Little is really know about this amazing animal. They were nocturnal, and they were pretty much gone before study and preservation of their kind was entertained. The young were called Joeys and up to 4 were born in a litter, and they were carried in the pouch for up to three months.

They were exclusively carnivorous. They were known for hunting both large game, Kangaroos, Emu's, and anything smaller including possums.

They are officially considered to be extinct, but continued (and unverified) sightings have people hoping for the best. I hope they have managed to survive somehow. But more importantly, I hope that people have learned to respect these creatures, so that if they have survived, they will continue to do so. Again 4 million years is a most impressive run, to bad we ended it.

Old Friends

Every year the farm is blessed with some very special guests. A family of Bald Eagles come every spring and stay around 6 weeks.

I was tramping across Australia when their yearly visit happened this time... or so I thought. They are back. Not the whole brood mind, just the parents. The father eagle is massive, and momma is no slouch either.

This is the first time I remember them visiting twice in one year. But it makes me feel great that they are here as I missed them the first time around. Just thought that was pretty cool.