May Long

It's Monday night of May long weekend. And it snowed. No big surprise there, it snows EVERY May long weekend. I always get a kick of the campers getting ticked off when they get snowed on.

What did you expect guys? You've lived in this country how long?

Yah I know, pleasure at the expense of others is a nasty thing to be amused at, but I never claimed to be a poster child of cordial behavior. Actually, I'm down right catty at times. I'll have to work on that.

Moving on, I spent Saturday taking a canopy course with Doug Fourth. He's a professional skydiver with over 15000 jumps, and a wicked sense of humor. I had a great time and learned some more valuable skills. Would so take that course again (and I'll take the swooping course next year I think).

At the end of the day, there was an opportunity to do something stupid. And hey, ya gotta know I'm the first one to sign up. Heres the story. Every year at May long there is a pig roast up the road from the DZ, hosted by "Sly". (I have never met said Sly, but that's another story) Anyway, it's for assorted bikers and their playmates. An interesting crowd to say the least.

The point, and yes there is one, is that the really experienced guys swoop the pig roast every year. It's the ultimate party crash, and Sly has more or less made it the high light of the weekend. (an unofficial hire) My involvement was driving the boys back from the pig roast, which meant getting a wrist band allowing me and the other drivers past the guards at the gate (you think I would walk into that place alone? I'm not that stupid).

Anyway, we were all packed up and getting ready to leave, when I spotted this guy pretending to be human. I'm looking at him, wondering if my eyes are playing tricks on me. He had long black dread locks, a long black goatee, a spiked dog collar, and horns. Yes that's right horns. Some sort of implants to give him the appearance of horns coming up under his skin. I couldn't believe it.

I turned to John, who is ex military and rarely smiles on his best days, and asked him if the guy really had horns. He gave me a raised eyebrow, and looked over my shoulder at said person. He promptly started laughing, a lot. He couldn't even speak. Then Holly chimed in with "it's like a train wreck, I can't look away". Realizing where we were, we kept it very low key, and then nearly wet ourselves on the ride back with the creative commentary.

My favorite part was speculating on the last time he looked in the mirror, and if he actually realized how the image came across. He was clearly going for Scary Evil Biker, and ended up with Trick or Treat! Though I am proud of maintaining my impulse control. The urge to walk up to him and poke him in the forehead was incredible. Horns, Seriously! I'm going to enjoy that particular fashion statement for years to come.

Here's to the human ego, a bottomless pit of entertainment.