Life, the Universe, and the Number 42

Some will know the reference the title makes, some not. Meh, it is what it is.

I've been very angry lately. There is a lot going into that, some of which can be shared, some of which is none of anyone's business. What else is new.

There she goes again, making it very clear that the lines in the sand are still drawn. That's just who I am I guess. My one sister describes me as a very private person, where as my other sister views me as crass. Most likely the same thing, only their perspectives differ.

I find this time of year very complicated. I am referring to Remembrance Day. I've always felt that one day a year is insufficient to properly honor those who gave their very beings for us. More so that I know many people currently serving over seas, and many more in the process of preparing to deploy. Perhaps it is also affected by having known someone who did not return from war. Hard to believe it's going to be 2.5 years come December. Time is a merciless mistress, but our mistress all the same.

Anger seems to be an old friend. I have had many occasions where it's all that has kept me going. A place where the last reserves of strength hide. It's by no means healthy, but it is there. Harness it and control it's outlet. Define it and defuse it. Learn to live with the potential, and be in control.

That's a funny word, isn't it? Control. There are so very many things that we do not have control of. We have the illusion of control, but no actual power. I guess that is why it's so easy to release control of the things we do have power over. Easy to make the excuses and shirk responsibility. But that's all they are, excuses.

Doesn't change anything. Bottom line you still have to deal with your baggage. No one else can do it for you, they can help if you open yourself to them, but they can't do it for you. You just gota put on your big girl undies and deal with it. Easy advise to give, following through is another matter.